Republican Pledge: No More Talking About Trump

The media are so desperate for Republicans to nominate Donald Trump that they've turned over 96.7% of their programming to covering him, with brief interruptions for Emmett Till ...

Robert F. Kennedy Jr.

Camelot Cronies

Now that Robert F. Kennedy has declared his candidacy for America’s highest office, I can spill some beans about his family, having known many of them since before JFK became ...

Trump is the Media’s New David Duke

The media are so desperate to get Donald Trump the Republican presidential nomination that they're acting like the fat lady has sung -- and they don't mean Chris Christie. They ...

L.A. City Hall

The Right’s Big Brush-Off

Here’s a fun fact: My cousin was one of the attorneys who got silicone breast implants banned in the 1990s. As regular readers know, my biological dad killed Elvis. So my ...

How Not to Be President

Now that we know Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis is running for president (along with several others whose names I can't remember), I have a helpful primer on what NOT to do as ...

Ron DeSantis

President DeSantis?

Recently, Gov. Ron DeSantis sat down with me for a one-hour interview. I started by praising him for keeping Florida largely open during Covid. "I just had to make the decision ...

Vivek Ramaswamy

President Ramaswamy?

Entrepreneur Vivek Ramaswamy is obviously a long shot presidential candidate, but he's refreshing. Unlike most politicians, he speaks clearly and seems smart. He probably is ...

Thank You for Your Disservice

Christians and Jews have had their Holy Week; now it’s my turn. Ten years ago, April 20, 2013, I was “outed” as David Cole. April 20, as you likely know, is a loaded ...

You’re Being Played, Republicans!

A few years ago, I posted this riddle on Twitter: What's easier to roll than an Easter egg? Answer: Donald Trump. Now, I can add: What's easier to roll than Donald ...

Ron DeSantis

Heavy D Don’t Tweet, He Acts

Isn't it great to have the media complaining about what a Republican is doing, instead of what he's tweeting? The New York Times recently did a major investigation into Gov. Ron ...

My Draft DeSantis Presidential Announcement Speech

With Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis busy running the third-largest state, enacting a magnificently conservative agenda, promoting a new book, and having to respond to endless demands ...

Arnold Schwarzenegger

The Trumpbart Primary

I was gonna open this column with “One of the questions I’m frequently asked about the Holocaust,” but that would’ve been dishonest. I’m never asked questions about the ...

Midterm for the Worse, Part III: Disjoin or Die

Last week I was watching Tammy Bruce on Fox, and...hey, is she still a lesbian? That used to be her thing, right? Whatever happened with that? Tammy Bruce’s lesbianism was like ...

Midterm for the Worse, Part II: These Firsts Shall Be Our Last

I get it, you’re tired of the midterms. Time to move on! After all, the GOP controls the House...by such a slim majority one softball shooter with decent aim could blow it to ...

Can Republicans Make Congress Great Again?

There's no sugarcoating the disappointing results of the midterm elections . Even with one of the worst-performing presidents in modern times, Joe Biden, and even with 2 out of 3 ...

The Leech Dismount

Trump's been called a lot of things in recent years, but I'm going to call him something new. First, a refresher. In 2015, the Republican Party was on life support, with a "Do ...


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